Instead of a congratulations, all I'm seeing today on Twitter and Facebook is how my baby is doomed because Snooki is the mother. Listen, if I didn't think that Snooki was a responsible person I would not have started a family with her. I haven't received one congratulations or "nice going" from anybody and frankly I'm shocked. Snooki is really excited about this and would appreciate it if you showed some sort of support for her. You are all probably thinking that either Vinny or Gianni is the father but honestly those two guys were just coverups for me. I"m here in college trying to get a degree and make money for our brand new family so I really didn't have time to star on the show. I was also a little different from the rest of the cast. Chances are with my big mouth I wouldn't have survived 3 days in that house, let alone an hour walking on the boardwalk. During this time I ask that you please respect the privacy of my soon to be wife as we deal with this stressful, yet exciting time. And one more thing, enough talk about the Mayans and all this trash. If anything, my baby will defy all odds and be the last remaining human on Earth. Wouldn't that just be a nightmare. A Ryan combined with a Snooki starting civilization all over again. Boom.
Isn't she just the cutest?
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